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1 Month/31 Days/744 Hours/44640 Minutes/2678400 Seconds
July 21, 2005

Ah jeezus, I’m counting again, aren’t I? We’ve finally reached the one month mark, but I am disappointed by the lack nerves on my part. I thought that at this point, I would be rushing around freaking out about stuff and being a generally horrible person to everyone around me, but I’m not. I’m not a highly organized person, but with this wedding stuff, just getting things done has been a pretty easy task to fulfill. There are only a few more things I really have to worry about, and the M.o.H. has my back. Amy and I had a wonderful meeting last night, after which she had a surprise of her own, which was really really awesome, and maybe took the edge off of her totally tough week (to say the least).


Almost everyday when I get home from work, I am plain exhausted. I lie on my bed (as the bedroom is the coolest place in the house) and read until I’m cool enough to fall asleep. I doze for 2 hours, wake up in a pool of sweat and drool, and wander aimlessly around the house, feeling off-kilter and hot, trying to figure out what time and day it is. Usually by 10, the air outside has cooled off a bit, I turn all of the fans on high, and I climb back into bed around 11. I can’t fall asleep until well after midnight, and wake up for work the next morning to start the process all over again. Such an existence is, indeed, not very gratifying.

Creating Section Titles, A La Mimi Smartypants

In 27 days, I will turn 26. I’ve been in my early-to-mid 20s for quite a while – I’m not sure how I feel about being in my mid-to-late 20s already. Like a lot of other people in my generation, I feel kind of at a loss about what to do with my life. I’m getting married in a month, don’t plan on having kids too soon, and don’t consider my current job a career. I like what I do a lot, but I can’t see myself doing it for the rest of my life. I don’t know exactly what I want to do for the 70+ years I have left. I suppose it’s not really all that important right now. Things will happen as they happen…

MISC. Thought:

Has anyone else noticed that it’s just too tiresome to be worried all the time? I don’t know how some people do it.

Nothing to do with anything else:

Ben and I took an impromptu drive to Lucky Peak last night to take pictures of the moon. Ben has a swell zoom lens that’s able to capture a lot of detail, but with something that far away, there was too much “atmosphere” (haze) between us and it to get a really crisp photo. We’ll have to go up to Bogus or something to get the best view. We spoke with a woman that was out there with her kids, toting a telescope. We asked if we could take a look, but it was broken. Being somewhat familiar with telescopes, I took a look at it, and realized that one of the mirrors was loose and obviously not set up correctly. After the kids and mom took off, we smoked a couple of cigarettes, ate some jerky, and drank water, all while staring at the blinding whiteness of the moon.

And suddenly this has turned into the most boring blog in the world, natch.


What is this really great news that Amy has? Somebody tell me because I'm going to die in the next five minutes if I don't find out!!!

Posted by: fern at July 21, 2005 2:38 PM

Also, I really liked this post because it was lengthy and about nothing in particular, and I appreciate blogs like that. Seriously.

Posted by: fern at July 21, 2005 2:39 PM

well...i'm freaking about my wedding....now...

Posted by: j-a at July 30, 2005 8:46 PM

What does "natch" mean so that I can use it? I love the word already.
Regarding the being tired thing. At first I thought that maybe you've got mono or something. I know that if you had it before it can still affect you later in life. Scratch that. I don't know, but I heard. Anyway, most people have had mono...so, who knows?
Being exhausted sucks. Its really depressing when you'd rather sleep than engage in other more fun and stimulating activities, as can be the case with me sometimes. There's so little time in the day...that's why I am extremely serious when I say that we should have 4 day work weeks. Has a hundred years of technology not bought us any more time?? Now husbands AND wives work just to survive. Fuck this aspect of modern life. I don't want to live to work. I intent to--you guessed it--work to live. ug, cliches...

About turning 26. I plan on being 29 the rest of my life. On November 1, I will celebrate my 29th birthday for the second time. Denial is great. Its like, if I don't take off my hat, then I'm not really balding, right? See, I took the whole "if a tree falls in a forest..." thing seriously.

I think I blew the worry fuse a long time ago. Doesn't mean I don't have low levels of anxiety, but I just don't really worry anymore.

Cool, I haven't checked out the moon through a telescope in a long time... Great idea for a Joshifer activity. Or, a group bonfire/full moon campout somewhere past Arrowrock.

Posted by: Josh at August 4, 2005 10:02 PM

4 josh - "natch" is a shortened form of "naturally", which is used a lot nowadays.
also, about the hat and balding thing, that really gave me a good laugh. thank you for that. ^_^

Posted by: Devlyn at August 7, 2005 6:44 PM