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guh. so i'm all sleepy
February 28, 2003

so i'm all sleepy again, and i don't know why... for some reason, i just totally wind down towards the end of the day, and want to just crawl back into bed. mmm... or it could be that i didn't get to bed until midnight, had to come in an hour early today, and ben called me last night at 3am and we talked for an hour, with me mostly crying. so, by the time i got up this morning, my eyes were still all puffy. so i was all depressed last night because ben is probably going to go on with the rest of his trip instead of coming home early, like i had hoped. he is just such a part of my life, it seems as if there's a piece of me missing when he's gone. i really don't even know how to explain it. he was talking about how we've been together for about 2 1/2 years, and we're still as in love with each other as we ever were... *L* he was talking about how we kiss more than any other couple he knows. i just miss him, and there's nothing i would love more than to cuddle with him, and hug him, and kiss him, etc. it makes me sad when he's not around. of course, i also end up hanging around my friends a lot more when he's not here. but when he's here, and i don't hang around them as much, it's not a bad thing... it's like all i want... i don't need to hang out with zach and sara and everyone as much, because i have my best friend built-in. does anyone know what i mean? i'm also afraid that something will happen to him if he goes to egypt. there's a lot of shit going down over there right now. even thinking about it is making tears well up in my eyes, which i hate, because i'm at work.
okay, enough complaining... zach, laura, whitney(?), and i are going to some kind of function tonight that should be fun. they are having "heavy hors d'oeuvres"... dood, i so can't spell that. anyhow, should be fun... hope there's lots of wine and champagne. whee! smiles, everyone! ^_^