« today is april 3rd. i | Main | so this fucking sucks. i »

and though i felt like
April 9, 2003

and though i felt like i might have had something interesting to say today, i may not, indeed. the thought of people actually reading this rather frightens me, in an obscure way. yes, i actually found out that i at least have an audience of one. and the fact that it is someone whom i actually know makes me want to censure myself a bit. but then i think again, and decide not to. after all, if i cannot be truthful here, where can i be?
msnbc says that bagdhad has been "liberated" by "us" today, so that a few of the iraqis still there are having a grand old time looting things, shouting "thank you" to bush while doing so. the media takes this as a compliment, but i'm wondering if it's just the thought of stealing that is making people happy we're there. salaam hasn't posted since the 24th, which is more than 2 weeks ago. the over-hit website hosted a blog that was once written by 2 iraqi males, and when raed disappeared, salaam took over for a while. i'm actually quite worried that something bad has happened to him, though i hope it is not so. the more likely event is that the phones are not working, or the ISP that salaam dials up to is no longer functioning. whatever the case, i am hoping that a day will soon come where we can hear again from the voice that gave us news from the other side, untainted by the regime.
i fell asleep last night wondering what i would do with $1 million. i had made a wish that $1 million would suddenly show up in my checking account today, and i could have it tax-free, etc. the first thing i would do is pay off all of my debts. the second is not worrying about a job at this point, as i would have money to support myself for a while. after that, i really wouldn't know what to do. likely, i would just let it sit there and gain interest until i was able to move somewhere that felt more like home. i.e. england or france. alas, i have still not checked my account.
being unemployed, as the unemployed know, is rather boring. mostly i sit here, staring at kazaa, waiting for things to download. other than that, i read my discover or smithsonian magazines. i have read through all in my posession, so i'm trying to finish up the biography of camus that i borrowed from the library. the reading of that book is going rather slowly, as the writer tends to make chapters short and boring. i'm about halfway through the 400-page book, and i'm thinking i may just give it up, and go back to the library for more. i can even borrow DVDs there, which seems to be the safer thing to do. i have gotten back into the habit of watching teevee. well, not real teevee, but watching movies. during my unemployment, i have watched the extended version of the lord of the rings three times. i just can't get enough.
other than that, there's really not much to say... if i come up with something a bit more clever later, you'll be sure that i will put it up as quickly as possible. oh, and for those that read this, leave some fucking comments already. i put them there for a purpose. use them.